Sunday, June 27, 2010
the trip
I need some of you to weigh in on this. We can't figure out who is going to travel. It had pretty much been decided that one of us will go and one will stay with the boys. Lots of reasons for this. 1) daniel has a business partnership and traveling away for a week is a big stretch. In 2 years he has never been away from it for more than 2 days. 2) if he did manage to work it out, he would hit the ground working when we arrived home from seoul. I am thinking yikes. Jetlag for me, leah jetlagged and wrong time zoned, grief filled, and my 2 boys in need of mamma attention. I am thinking not having daniel's help those first days back will sink me. 3) i have never left anderson overnight and am worried about leaving him parentless for a week. If daniel stays home he will continue working and have a sitter during the day. If i stay home,he would still hit the ground working on arrival, but i would not be jetlagged and exausted. I would not have to leave anderson, but i would have forever missed picking up baby leah. I am not sure i want that. Sigh. Thoughts?
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About Me
- Elisabeth
- We are waiting to adopt our fourth child from the U.S.A. I am a momma to three other awesome children and wife to the love of my life. My boys are homegrown and my daughter is adopted from S. Korea . We cannot wait to meet our next baby!
Lurker popping in to say hello :) My husband traveled by himself three weeks ago to get our son. It was so nice having one of us on US time when they got back (I stayed home with our daughter). My advise, for what it's worth, is whoever is going to be doing most of the baby care should be the most rested before she comes home. We were also worried that our daughter would be resentful if I left her and came home with another child, so that was a factor for us.
ReplyDeleteHi Kristi! Congrats on bringing your son home! Do you have a blog?
ReplyDeleteGood advice, thanks!
You can read my thoughts about this on facebook because I also commented there. Can you afford to bring another adult to share in emotional/physical help? I'm just remembering Kara's husbands scenario about him saying he would take the escort over doing it solo again anyday. I am no expert by any means but I get so exhausted traveling that add a crying, grieving little one, long plane ride, jet lag, and high emotional state and what do you have? Probably a meltdown of sorts:) The thing is, is that we have no way to know if we will have a calm/upset baby and It kind of scares me to think about what those first 2 weeks are like. I'm not sure there is a general wrong/right answer..just whatever makes you the most comfortable.
ReplyDeleteYea, I am definately nervous to go it alone, mainly for the plane ride home. I can maybe get my sister to go, which would be awesome!
ReplyDeleteI have a blog from our daughter's adoption (China) but haven't updated it since '08. If one of you does travel alone make sure you utilize all the wonderful, helpful people on the plane. Some wonderful Korean women held our son for 4 hours so my husband could get some sleep. I guess there is no where to go on a plane and Reid did much better with the women who spoke Korean and looked like his foster mom. I think they took pity on the man traveling alone :)
ReplyDeleteHere are my 2 cents. I think it is GREAT to have one person who is rested who can take care of the baby and let the other person rest once back home.
ReplyDeleteBoth DH and I traveled, but if only one of us could have went, I would have wanted it to be me. Being in Seoul was the most incredible experience of my life. There is just nothing that compares to being in the same country as your child and seeing where he/she lived and getting to meet the foster mother.
I think it would be a good idea to have some other family member or close friend go with either of you if at all possible just to help out. I also followed Kara's husband's journey and it sounded rough on his own!! If you decide to go, Elisabeth, maybe you can start experimenting with leaving Anderson overnight with family or friends now, so he wouldn't be completely shocked when you're gone for a whole week. I agree with Sandra about experiencing Seoul. I think it will be amazing!! I would just make sure you are completely okay with not going if you decide not to in the end so as not to regret it later on down the road. Everyone is different, and you have to do what is right for your family.
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